In Fear and Faith
by vzombie
Summary: My name is Riley. I'm a close friend of Evelyn and the Mercer boys. I grew up with them, they're all the family I have. Jack is my best friend, I'm closer to him than anyone else. Everyone seems to think we're in love, we'll see.
1. Chapter 1

*****I do not own anything from Four Brothers nor do I have anything to do with any actor, character or anything of that nature involved with the film. My story is pure fiction and for your enjoyment.*****

_Chapter 1; I'll Try my Best to be Home by Then_

I bundled up before walking outside into the frigid Detroit winter's air. I wrapped my scarf around my neck before slipping on my gloves. I walked out my front door, closing and locking it behind before heading down to Ms. Mercer's just three houses down. I did my best to keep from slipping on the slush that covered the ground. I smiled to myself as I reached the open front door; she stood there waiting just as she always did.

"Hi Ma" I grinned stepping into the warm house.

She caught me in a hug, "Hey Riley "

I tilted my nose up, smelling the warm sent of Ma's homemade apple pie. "Oh boy!" I smiled knowing exactly what she was cooking. I took my gloves off and scarf off before slipping my off my coat and laying them on the back of the couch.

"Are any of the boys around?" I asked following her into the kitchen

She pulled out an apple pie out of her oven "Nope, just us. They should all be visiting for Christmas though." She smiled, "Jack asked about you when I talked to him a few days ago. Bobby and the rest of the boys have asked about you every so often too."

I smiled to myself; I'd always had a crush on Jack. He and I were closest in age; he was the easiest one to relate to; incredibly funny and overall the sweetest yet corniest boy I'd ever met. I missed him; he was my childhood best friend. He was in most of my cherished memories growing up. Bobby, Jerry and Angel had somewhat adopted me as a little sister, keeping me safe from danger if anything was to happen. They would always come to my rescue if dad was beating up on me. I always thought of Ms. Evelyn as a mother, since I didn't have one of my own. I smiled up at Ma as she put a large slice of pie in front of me. "Thanks" I muttered taking some onto my fork and shoving it in my mouth. "Mmm" I sang pleased "Good as always!" I told her as she walked back over to table with a cup of coffee in her hand.

"Glad you like it, dear." She smiled taking a sip of her coffee. "How's school been?"

I finished chewing up the bite of pie before answering, "Good, good, feels weird being a sophomore in college. I'm doing well though, I like my new classes and I've made a few new friends."

She nodded. "I'm glad to hear that. Have you heard anything from your father?"

I shook my head, "No m'am. I haven't heard anything from him since this summer. He'll write a letter every now and then, but nothing serious. I always write one back, but who knows if he actually reads it…"

My dad had been in and out of jail and prison for as long as I could remember; every time he went in she was who always took me in. The boys help take care of me, made sure I was doing my homework and keeping up with my grades, things like that. When I stayed over, I used to always sneak into Jack's room at night to lay with him, he would always comfort me when I was scared or had nightmares of my dad beating me, something that was a typical in my house. Not long before I turned sixteen, my father got life in prison without parole, leaving me there alone. This was fine with me because I had Ma and the boys just down the street.

She shook her head "I should have adopted you, I'm sorry I didn't. I'm sorry you had to live with that sorry –" She cut herself off and threw her hands up toward the ceiling in surrender. "I'm just glad you're mine now!"

I smiled. "I was always yours, Ma."

I heard the phone ring and she got up to answer it, I ate the last bite of pie before putting my plate in the sink.

I overheard bits and pieces of her conversation, simple things like 'That's good' and 'I miss you too'. Last thing I heard was 'Yeah, she's here... One sec' I felt her tap my shoulder, I turned around to see her pushing the phone at me.

_Who is it?_ I mouthed taking the phone from her, she said nothing she just nodded her head for me to talk, winked and returned to the kitchen table.

"Er, hello" I uttered into the phone dragging my hand threw my hair.

"Hey Riley " I heard Jack chime. I was almost positive he was grinning.

"Jackie!" I squealed biting the inside of my lip. "How are you? I miss you come home!" I laughed.

He laughed, "I miss you too, Rye. I'm okay, traveling with the guys. I've been really homesick the past few weeks, I've called mom at least once a day, if not more."

We both laughed. "Why are you homesick? Don't you have a girlfriend or uh, a groupie?"

He got quiet, he cleared his throat. "No"

I said nothing for a long awkward moment, "Oh sorry… I wasn't trying to be nosy or accuse you of anything."

"No, no it's fine Riley . Don't worry about it." He assured me quickly. He was quiet for another moment afterward. I listened in the background for a few moments. "Hey, Riley , I gotta go. I'm going to call you back tonight though; I might be coming home soon. At least, I hope to."

"Oh, okay." I muttered into the phone.

"Love you, Riley . Be safe and look after mom for me, I promise I'll call you tonight after my show." He said anxiously.

"I love you too, Jack. I'll wait up; you take care of yourself too." I said before hanging up the phone.

I glanced back over at the table to find Ma sipping her coffee and grinning at me. "You know, you two would be really cute together…" She pointed out still grinning.

I laughed "I don't know about all that, Mom." I said sheepishly, walking back over to the sink and began to clean the couple of dishes. "Did Jack tell you he was trying to come home soon?" I asked her, placing a soapy bowl on the other side of the sink.

She set her cup in the dirty side and began rinsing dishes as I washed them. "No, but I don't doubt he will be."

I laughed and finished up the dishes. "I have class tonight, Ma." I explained drying off my hands.

She rinsed the last dish and placed it in the strainer. "Oh, okay. If you want you can come by the house after class, I'm making supper later than usual. I have to run up to the convenient store for a few small things. I'll put you a plate in the oven."

I smiled, "Thanks Ma." I kissed her cheek before grabbing my coat and things, bundling up before I went outside. I gave her a small wave through the window as I walked back down to my house.


	2. Chapter 2

*****I do not own anything from Four Brothers nor do I have anything to do with any actor, character or anything of that nature involved with the film. My story is pure fiction and for your enjoyment.*****

_Chapter 2; Disbelief_

I sat at the library attempting to study but it bored me and I had this uneasy feeling the whole time. Something was wrong, something had happened. I left early, scared there had been a family emergency and rushed home. I stopped at Ma's house first, to make sure everything was okay.

I walked up to the house slowly after seeing Jerry's car. I didn't bother to knock; I just walked into the house.

"Mom?" I called looking around "Jerry?" I shouted "Where are you?" I took off my coat and placed it over the couch, just as I always did. I saw Jerry come from the kitchen, his eyes swollen and red. He hugged me tight but said nothing. "What the fuck happened?" I demanded with tears welling up in my eyes. "Where's mom?" I screamed, "Jerry where is Ma?" I begged trying to escape his grip.

He held me tighter, keeping me still. "She – She got shot, Riles. When she went to the store to pick up things, there was a holdup and she got shot."

"No!" I shrieked collapsing into him. He caught me and walked me over to the couch. I sat down placed my head in my hands and started to sob. He sat next to me and held me, rocking me back and forth, hushing me softly. "What – What about the boys? Do they know yet?" I asked looking up at him.

He nodded, "Yes, they do. They're all making arrangements to come as soon as possible."

"Jack and Bobby," I sobbed, "I want Jack and Bobby."

"Do you want me to call them?" He suggested looking down at me. I nodded and sat up from him, lying back on the couch. He pulled out his cellphone and dialed a number. He handed it back to me. "It's Bobby" He told me before getting up and disappearing back into the kitchen. I held the phone up to my ear.

"Hello" I heard him answer in his manly tone. I could hear in his voice he was upset, he had been crying.

"Hi, Bubba," I sniffled out.

"Riley." I heard him realize, his voice went low and smooth. "Hey, how you holdin' up?"

I sniffed again, huffing in deep breaths. "Not good, when will you be here?"

"Soon," He told me sympathetic, "Soon. Jackie is on his way right now, I'm leaving out tomorrow after class so I'll be there for the wake. Jerry is going to stay with you tonight; Jack should be there tomorrow morning. Angel isn't sure when he can make it, you know how much of a bitch it is to get him anywhere with him in the forces and all."

I nodded, sniffling again and breathing somewhat easier. "Yeah, I know. I think I'm going to call Jack and check on him. Call me tomorrow when you're on your way."

"I will. Don't worry; you know the boys and I are going to get to the bottom of this. We're going to take care of you, don't worry."

I smiled and wiped my eyes. "Thanks, B. I love you, be careful, okay? Please, take the advice you give. Everything will be fine." I reminded him.

"Yeah, okay. I'll call you tomorrow." He said before hanging up.

I scrolled through Jerry's contacts before finding Jack to call him.

He answered within the first couple of rings. "Hey Jeremiah, is everything okay?" His voice was almost not understandable, he sounded awful.

"Yeah, Jackie. Everything is fine." I told him.

"Oh, sorry. Hey Riley, are you okay?"

I didn't say anything at first. "I'm okay, I guess." I said blandly.

"I'm on my way home. I might be home tonight if I get on this flight I'm waiting on."

I smiled, "Really?"

"Mmhm," He hummed softly. "You'll be sleeping with me tonight, right?"

I laughed, "Of course. Now seems like the perfect time to bring that tradition back. I'm sorry, Jack. I'm really sorry. I –"

He cut me off before I could finish. "Don't you dare try to take the blame for this, Riley. You had nothing to do with it, nothing. Don't you feel guilty," he warned.

I swallowed, "O-Okay, Jack. How long do you think it'll take to get here?" I asked looking over at the clock on the wall.

"I'll be home around one, two at the latest." He said. I yawned, "Go ahead get in the bed; I'll meet you there when I get in. Okay?"

"Okay."

"I'll be there soon," he told me before hanging up.

I closed Jeremiah's phone, walked up the stairs and left it in his bedside table. He rolled over to look at me, "You alright?" He asked in a low murmur.

I nodded, "I think I'm just gunna get some sleep, I'll be in Jack's room if anything happens. He's on his way." I told him walking out.

I heard him chuckle to himself, "Now ain't the time to be getting your grind on up in my momma's house!" He teased.

I laughed, "Never, Jerry!" I surrendered, smiling to myself.

I climbed into the bed; it was the same as I remembered. Medium sized mattress with the same simple bed set. Only big enough for Jack and me if we were extremely close to each other. I closed my eyes and said my prayers, I prayed for mom, the boys and I. I even prayed for the man who shot her, not because I wanted to, not because I felt it was right but because that's the woman she'd raised me to be and I knew that was what she wanted.

I slept comfortably for an hour or two before I felt Jack climb into the bed with me. Scared it would be somewhat awkward, I moved over and got as close to the wall as I could. I lay on my side so I could see his face, still half asleep but my eyes were open. He smiled at me as he pulled the covers over himself. All he wore was his long johns, something I would always remember about him. He only wore long johns to bed. I tried to hold in my giggle but I couldn't. I burst out into laughter. He grinned and pulled me close to him.

"Shut up, Riles!" He laughed.

"Sorry, it's just funny to me. It's been a while, but I guess some things never change."

He smiled, "You're right, some things don't ever change."

I snuggled up to his bare chest, laying my head down over his heart. "I'm sorry, Jackie."

I felt him wrap his arms around me, "Shh," he whispered, "I already told you, stop dwelling on it." A tear fell from my right eye and before I could wipe it, Jack had already wiped it away with his thumb. "I hate this" He muttered with a long sigh.

"Me too," I breathed looking around the room.

He placed his hand in my hair and started to play with it, something he always did to help me calm down. "It'll be okay, Rye" He told me placing his cheek on the top of my head.

"I know, but it doesn't bring her back…"

He nodded. "I know that but, this isn't easy for me either. I'm the most fucked up one out of all of us."

I traced the small tattoo he had on just below his right collar bone with the tip of my index finger. "But you're also my favorite!" I told him with a small smile.

He laughed, "I guess that makes it a little better."

"Goodnight, Jack." I whispered closing my eyes.

"Night, Riley." He murmured hugging me.

Before I knew it, I was fast asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

*****I do not own anything from Four Brothers nor do I have anything to do with any actor, character or anything of that nature involved with the film. My story is pure fiction and for your enjoyment.*****

_Chapter 3; Holding Someone's Hair Back_

After the wake I returned back to my house leaving the boys at Ma's. I ran a hand through my hair as I entered my bedroom finding Jack sprawled out on my bed using his elbow to prop himself up. "Shit!" I jumped back startled "What the hell are you doing here Jack?"

His eyes were red and swollen from crying all day. "I don't know, I guess I just didn't want you to be alone"

I shook my head "I'm a big girl, Jackie. I think I can handle it. You should be with your brothers!" I scolded sifting through my drawers for some comfy clothes.

"They told me to come over here." He smiled. Those assholes, they were just like mom was they wanted us to be together. They thought we'd be 'cute' together, well I had news for them, Jack was my best friend that was all. So what if I slept with him for comfort, so what if I missed him when he was away it was because he was my best friend for God's sake.

I raised an eyebrow. "Right, well okay. I'm going to change, so could you uh, get out?" I smirked. He rose from the bed and stalked out of my room and down the stairs stopping in what I assumed was the living room. I shut my door behind him and started to undress.

I had so much going on in my head, work, school, Mom, Jack and the boys, how was I going to sort it all out? Soon, everyone was going to go back to their lives and I'd be here all alone. I didn't want that, I didn't want to be alone. I guess Jerry would still be here, but he had a wife and kids. Mom was always here, just a couple houses down; I could go and come whenever I pleased. It wasn't like that anymore. I quickly slipped into my sweatpants and t-shirt on and headed down stairs.

I found Jack on the couch; I walked over and sat close to him. He quickly used the back of his hands to wipe the tears from his face. "Stop it Jackie" I whispered wrapping my arms around him and laying my head on his shoulder. "You know, it's not just you here for me, I'm here for you too."

He nodded. "I know, it's just really hard, because with my brothers, it's okay if I'm the weak one. I'm the baby it's expected, with you, it's different. I can't be weak, I have to be strong."

I looked up at him confused "But why?"

"You're a girl; I'm your best friend. I have to be strong for you. I have to hide the hurt, I know Bobby wasn't around a lot of my life but that was one thing he did imprint in my head. You have to be the strong one around everyone else."

I shook my head, "Not with me, no you don't. You're a human and so is Bobby, you're two different people, you handle things differently." I explained wiping a tear from his cheek.

"Sorry, I'm not meaning to cry. They just keep falling." He apologized looking away from me.

"Shut your mouth, fucker." I ordered with a small smile.

He laughed "I've missed you, Riley. Just your company makes me feel less like a fuck up and more like a normal person."

I smiled "Good" I rested my head back on his shoulder and we sat in silence. Nothing was said we just sat there, he played with my hair and I traced my fingers over his chest. Doodling random things. We sat there for a few minutes before his cellphone rang. He quickly shoved his hand into his pocket and fished it out.

"Yeah?" He answered somewhat annoyed "Bobby, I –" He cut him off with a threat "Fuck, okay I'm coming, shit. I'm bringing Riley, too." He said hanging up.

I looked up at him confused "Bringing me where?" I asked with my eyebrows pushed together. He shrugged and got up.

"Do I have time to change?" I shrieked looking down at my t-shirt and sweats.

He laughed "Yeah, hurry up." He said standing by the front door.

I quickly ran up the stairs and changed into a pair of tights pulling my jeans up over them. I slipped on a hoodie then a leather jacket over that, finally pulling my black suede boots on over my socks. If I knew Bobby like I thought I did, he was about to lead us on a wild goose chase or to a bar. It was one of the two choices. Either way, I wasn't about to freeze my ass off.

I ran back down the stairs finding Jack in the same place he was. I grabbed my bag off the coffee table, double checked for my keys and cellphone before locking the door and following Jack outside. He was walking a few feet ahead of me and I jogged to catch up to him.

His one step was two of my own, he was a tower compared to me. I looked up at him as we walked, he stood at 6 feet 2 inches and I was only 5'5 1/2".

He caught me staring and looked down "What?" he questioned looking at me perplexed.

I shook my head "Nothing, just remembering how much taller you are than me." I admitted with a laugh

He chuckled. "Yeah, I know. I'm taller than everyone!" He opened the front door for me and I walked inside. Bobby met us at the door; he looked like he usually did, pissed off. He took Jack by the arm and pulled him into the kitchen. I listened as he started scolding him. He yelled at him, told him he was acting like a little bitch and he needed to get his shit together.

Jack waited for him to finish before he argued his point. "I didn't want her to be alone, Bobby. It's not safe or right, she was her mom too." He defended in a low tone. "I'm sorry" He apologized in a lower tone.

Bobby came back into the living room looking me over. I felt like crying but I knew I shouldn't because that would only fuel him. That's just the way he is, don't let it get to you I repeated over and over in my head.

"Hey Bobby" I said trying to pull my lips into a small smile.

"Hey" He said in a short tone, "is she coming to the bar too?" he asked turning to look at Jack.

He nodded. "Is that okay?"

"Yeah, whatever. Hurry up" He instructed more annoyed than usual. "I'll be out in the car."

I watched carefully as he stalked out the door closing it hard behind him. I let out a long sigh before turning around to face Jack. He pulled his lips into a small smile. "He means well, Riles. He really does."

I shook my head "I don't have the slightest clue that would lead you to actually believe that." I walked out the door pausing to wait on Jack before walking down the steps. Jack shrugged locking and closing the door behind him. We both walked down to Bobby's old car. It was almost never in the driveway, he insisted on parking it on the curb.

I climbed into the back seat while Jack took his place in the passenger seat. Bobby looked over at Jack before he cranked the car. "Did you lock the front door, cracker jack?" Jack nodded. Bobby started the car and started off down the road.

"You've had this car forever, B. My God when are you gunna upgrade?" I muttered glancing around the back seat at all the same old rips and tears, noticing a few newer ones.

I looked over at Jack who was holding back a smile. "Hey, don't hate on the car. She's a good car!" Bobby retorted.

I laughed to myself and saw Jack smile. "If she's still running after all the shit you've put her through, I don't think I have much of an argument." I snickered

"Shut up, Riley." Bobby snapped.

Jack and I exchanged an amused smile. "Yes sir!" I grinned.

We sat in silence for a while. I caught Jack looking at me more than once but I didn't mind. I just smiled and he smiled back.

"Bobby" Jack uttered before scratching the back of his head "do you think Riley can stay with us tonight? Since the funeral is tomorrow and all, I think it would be good for the both of us."

Bobby didn't answer at first; he just looked at me in his rearview mirror. I shot him a pleading grin and a traditional 'Pleeeease.'

He huffed and turned his head to the side. That was his way of saying 'I give up'. "Yeah" He gritted "just for tonight though!" he warned looking at me in the rearview mirror then glancing at Jack. Jack nodded his head and shot me a grin. Next thing I knew the car was silent and Jack and Bobby were getting out. "You comin' short shit?" Bobby teased pulling the seat forward for me to get out.

I gave a sour face "I'm not that much shorter than you, Bobby!" I countered climbing out into the freezing cold. He chuckled to himself shutting the door behind me as I walked toward the bar. He and Jack followed close behind me. "You better keep up with the boys tonight, sweetheart." Bobby taunted walking around me and to the bar where Jerry waited for us.

"Fuck" I muttered to myself following behind him. I felt Jack's hand on my spine, comforting me and guiding me to the bar.

I took my seat by Bobby. "You got this!" Jack encouraged taking the seat beside me.

I sighed "I sure hope so."

"4 shots of Crown" Bobby instructed the bartender motioning to Jack, Jerry, himself and I. I swallowed hard. This wouldn't end well, I knew it.

"Not too much, Bobby. Don't forget the funeral is tomorrow." Jack reminded him with a pleading glare.

Bobby shook his head and laughed. "I'm not taking it easy on your little girlfriend, she'll be okay." Jerry joined in the laughter while I just stared at Jack.

I snapped my head around to glare at Bobby. "I am not his girlfriend, Bobby. He is my best friend, nothing more." I sneered. I turned back to Jack and smiled. "Don't worry about it Jack, I'll keep up with the boys."

The bartender placed a shot in front of each of us. Bobby said a toast to mom and we all drank our shots down quick. I glanced over at Jack who was grinning at me from ear to ear. "You good?" He asked placing a hand on my shoulder. I nodded and he called for another round of shots. We did shot after shot, after everyone still checking that I was okay. I lost count at nine after that it really didn't matter. I had so many shots of different things; Jagermeister, Tequila and Malibu were the ones I could remember, I was sure I'd had it all though. I also remember drinking beer in between shots. Jerry stopped at a shot and a beer making sure he was sober enough to drive us home.

We stayed there only a few hours because Jerry had to be home early, he didn't tell his wife where he was going or who he'd be with. She had no clue Bobby had come back into town and we all knew it was better that way, at least for now. What few hours we had to spend together felt good, we were all laughing and catching up. I don't think I'd ever been this drunk before. Was this even legal? I was so drunk I almost forgot how old I was. After a while it all started going downhill quickly. I slowly turned to look at Jack. He looked fine, laughing and joking with Bobby and Jerry. I stared at him, slightly lost and a little frightened by how I started to feel.

He quickly noticed my facial expression. "Are you okay?"

I just sat there; I was scared to move anymore because I might throw up everywhere. I was woozy and lightheaded. "No" I finally choked out shaking my head slowly.

His eyes grew wide. "Oh shit, Bobby. I think she's about to blow chunks." Bobby looked over at me, scanning my expression before grabbing my arm lifting me up from my seat.

"Yeah, she is." He agreed placing my arm around his neck. "Help me get her outside." He told Jerry. Jerry quickly placed my other arm around his neck and started to walk with me outside. Jack walked faster to get in front of us so he could open the door.

"Hey!" I heard the bartender yell "You have to pay for your drinks." He shouted after us.

I saw Jack shoot him the bird, "A little busy at the moment. You'll get your money in a second." He told the man agitated. After I was outside I stumbled over to the side of the building and propped myself up against the wall. I heard Bobby tell Jack to stay with me, that he was going inside to pay so Jerry could take us all home.

It wasn't long after I'd been standing there that I started throwing up. Gagging hard before anything actually came up. It burned, God it burned. It came out my mouth and nose, bringing a raging fire with it. I felt Jack's hand rubbing my back; standing close to me to be sure I couldn't fall over. I used one of my hands to hold my hair back. I groaned between the spews of vomit. "I" I started before more came from my mouth "I'm sorry, Jackie" I whined before more came rushing out. He hushed me, rubbing my back and whispering 'It's okay. Just relax, Rye. Don't force it.' in my ear.

I was done throwing up by the time Bobby and Jerry made it back out. I felt a little better but not much. "Damn girl!" Bobby said looking down at the pile I'd made on the ground. "You sure don't hold your liquor well."

Jack and Jerry both looked at him annoyed. "Bobby, cut her some slack. You told her to keep up with us and she did. Her getting sick because of it isn't her fault, it's yours." Jack said in my defense. I was too worn out to care; I didn't even feel like fighting with him. He didn't say anything he just watched me.

"Fuck you, Bobby." I slurred shooting him the bird before stumbling towards Jack. I felt like I was going to fall over but he quickly extended his arm out to catch me, pulling me in close to him. "I want to go home now." I complained

"I wanna go home now." Bobby mocked in a high pitch whiny tone.

Jerry put his hand out toward Bobby a sign only Bobby and Jack understood. "Put your big boy pants on Bobby" he said in an irritated tone.

I climbed into the back seat of Jerry's family sized sedan. It was almost silent on the way home. The only talking was to ask me if I needed Jerry to pull over. I only had to answer 'Yes' once. When we had arrived back home Jack and Bobby helped me to Jack's room. Jerry was gone as soon as we got out of his car. He had to hurry home to Camille and the girls, hoping to make it home in time to avoid questioning.

I plopped down on the bed and curled into the fetal position, attempting to get comfortable. Jack was towering over me from the side of the bed. "Can I get you something?" he offered.

I nodded "Take these jackets and pants off me. I'm burning up." I explained lifting my leg up so he could take off my shoe. He took my shoes off one by one, then the jackets and last my pants. It probably would have made me uncomfortable if anyone else was helping undress me, but since it was Jack I didn't really think much of it. After helping me change he disappeared for a few minutes, returning in only his long johns. A glass of water in his hand and two small pills in his palm.

"Here" He said opening his hand for me to take the pills. I took them and placed them on my tongue grabbing the water and sipping it to help the pills down.

I gave him a small smile. "Night, Jack. Thank you." I murmured turning towards the wall.

He walked over to turn off the light before he climbed into bed. His arms wrapped around my waist, he placed his chin in the curve of my neck. "Goodnight, Riley."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4; Morning Mayhem

I was half asleep when I could feel an empty space that should've been filled by Jack. I gently laid my arm behind me to make sure I was alone. I sighed realizing I was, in fact, alone. I moved my hand back tucking it under my head and shutting my eyes. I lay there for a few more minutes, realizing what today is. I let out a long groan before sitting up. I reached my arms up toward the ceiling, pushing my legs out straight. I threw the covers off me and climbed out of bed.

I wandered down stairs, finding Jack in the kitchen. "Morning" He smiled sipping his tall glass of milk.

I ran my hand through my messy hair. "Morning" I smiled back grabbing a glass out of the cabinet. I grabbed the Orange Juice from the fridge and poured it into my glass and went to sit at the dining room table. I sipped my juice in silence as I let my mind wander. Today was the day, the day it all would finally sink in. She would be put six feet under. I couldn't lie to myself anymore after today, it was now my reality. The only woman I ever knew to be something of a mother to me was gone.

I was scared shitless, I didn't want to try to figure out my life without her. I wasn't ready, but it seemed as though I didn't have a choice. I held back the tears, my throat got tighter and tighter. I couldn't hold it in anymore and I just burst into tears. I tried to do it quietly but it wasn't long before I started to sniffle loud and gasp for air.

Jack walked into the dining room and stared at me, it was like he didn't know what to do. I looked back at him and shook my head. "I can't believe it, Jack. She's really gone!" I cried. I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to take slow deep breaths.

I felt his hands wrap around me from behind my chair. "I know, Riley, I know. It's okay, don't cry, it's going to be okay." He lulled letting go of me. I opened my eyes and seen that he was sitting beside me now, he placed his hand over mine. "I know it's hard, but remember what we talked about last night. If I can't cry, neither can you, fucker." He gave me a small comforting smile.

I giggled to myself and nodded. I used my free hand to wipe the tears from my face. "Thank you, Jackie" I smiled.

He removed his hand and nodded. He got up from the chair and pushed it back under the table. "I'm going to go take a shower, if you want you can head on back to your house so you can get ready and I'll come get you when it's time to go."

"Okay, let me just grab my bag –" I stopped myself mid-sentence realizing I didn't remember where I put my bag. "Shit" I muttered. "Where is my bag at Jack?" I asked placing my hand on my forehead racking my brain to remember.

He chuckled and smiled, "In my room. I grabbed it for you last night when we were bringing you in. You probably don't remember…" He laughed.

I let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, awesome, thank you. I didn't even think about it at all."

He nodded slowly, "Yeah, you were pretty wasted. I'm surprise you didn't puke all over yourself. I've never seen you that drunk!" He shrugged, "You kept up with the boys though." He smiled.

I laughed, "Yeah, I've never been that drunk before. I'm surprised I don't have a hangover!"

"The advil probably helped." He grinned.

"Probably" I agreed with a smile. "I guess I should get going, I don't want to have to rush to get ready." I explained walking to put my glass in the sink. He extended his arm out, asking for a good-bye hug. I looked up at him somewhat surprised before I stood on my tip-toes wrapping my arms around his neck. He gently nestled his chin into the curve between my neck and shoulder, wrapping his arms around my waist.

He released me and I shrunk back to my normal height. He looked down at me, his crystal gray-blue eyes shimmering. I pulled my lips into a small smile. "Be careful, Rye." He warned. I nodded before heading upstairs to grab my things. After I had gathered everything up, I walked back down and headed for the door, Jack was already out of the kitchen and in the bathroom with the shower running.

I followed out the door and to my house. I walked slowly, carefully watching everything around me. When I was close enough to my house I rummaged through my purse for my house key, quickly unlocking my door and walking in. I closed the door as soon as I made it in and locked it back. I walked up the stairs to my room and scanned the clothes in my closet for an outfit. "Black, black, something black" I muttered flipping through the different items of clothing. "Ah-ha!" I exclaimed pulling out a black strapless dress. I sifted through more clothes to find a black cardigan. I laid the outfit on my bed and grabbed panties and a bra from my drawer.

I went into my bathroom and turned the hot water on, then shifted it to the shower. I undressed and put my hand into the shower to see if the water was warm enough. Seeing that it was, I stepped into the shower. Letting the water cover me and drown out all my thoughts or worries, if it was washing them all away. I let my mind go blank, thinking about nothing, completely empty. I washed my hair, my body and lastly my face. I stood in the water until it started to run cold. I quickly jumped out and grabbed a towel and walked back into my bedroom.

I sat on my bed for a few minutes, just taking it all in. I didn't want to go; I didn't think I could handle it. I take that back I knew I couldn't handle it. I couldn't be a coward either, what did Bobby tell me last night? I need to keep up with the boy, that's what I was going to do, I was going to suck it up and deal. They were going, so should I. I slipped into my dress, pulling on my cardigan afterward. I went back into the bathroom and twisted my bangs before pinning them back out of my face. I looked myself over in the mirror, deciding whether or not I should wear makeup. I laughed at myself once I realized what I was talking about.

I thought skipping makeup all together was the best idea. I returned to my bedroom and started gathering things for my purse. I made sure I placed a few dollars in my wallet and a pack of tissues as well. I grabbed my flats from my closet and slipped them on. I heard something coming from downstairs. It sounded like someone came in the front door, I swallowed hard and my mind began to race.

"Jack?" I called stepping toward the door. Silence was the only thing that answered me. "Fuck" I whispered terrified. "Jack, it's not funny, if it's you speak up." I shouted. I could only imagine how much my voice squeaked. I heard something; someone was coming up the stairs. "Shit, shit, oh shit" I breathed looking around the room for something I could use as a weapon. I panicked and unplugged the lamp from my bedside table; I could hit the robber over the head with it. They weren't walking up steps anymore, now they were coming down the hall. I walked over to the door and stood against the wall, invisible to the person until they were close enough for me to hit them with the lamp. I took a deep breath as they stepped into my view, they walked through the door and I swung.

"Fuck!" I heard a familiar voice yelp. I gasped, realizing it was Jack. "Jesus Christ, Riley!" He yelled holding his nose. "Was that really necessary?" He demanded looking at me furious.

I grew angry after hearing his tone. "Yeah, it was, you fucking prick!" I shouted placing the lamp on the floor. "You need to quit coming into my damn house! I mean I know the extra key is at Ma's but shit! That doesn't give you the right to use it as you please!" I snapped crossing my arms across my chest.

He removed his hand and looked down at it. It held a pool of blood. "Great" he muttered looking down at it. "What the fuck do I do now?" He questioned looking over to me.

I looked at him, his eyes pleading with me. I stepped closer to him, grabbed his hand and placing it back over his nose before shoving his head back and guiding him into my bathroom. I snatched some toilet paper from the roll and placed it over his nose, replacing his bloody hand with the other clean one. "Tilt your head back, dickweed!" I instructed when he tried to look in the mirror. I put the toilet seat down "Sit" I said pushing him back onto it.

I grabbed the peroxide, two tampons and a washcloth from my bathroom closet. "I'm sorry, Riles." Jack frowned.

I shoved his head back and stood over him. "You're going to be even sorrier when I bust your damn lip in a second. Now, hold your damn head back so I can clean it and stop the bleeding." I took the washcloth and poured some peroxide on it and wiped his nose making sure to get the edges too. "Now relax" I told him after I figured the bleeding had stopped. It was still flowing pretty good, so I decided to try something new.

I started unwrapping the tampons and his eyes grew wide. "What the fuck are you doing, Riley?"

"Shut up or it's going up your ass!" I threated pulling them out of the holders. I quickly but gently shoved them up his nostrils.

He furrowed his eyebrows together. "But why?" He begged with puppy dog eyes.

"It's going to help Jack." I assured him with a grin.

He shook his head and chuckled. "You just like making me look like a dumbass…" He corrected with a straight face.

"Maybe" I agreed throwing the trash away before leaving the bathroom. "Wash your hands" I reminded him double checking that I had everything in my purse.

After washing his hands he returned to my room, pausing at my dresser to look at an old photo of us I had framed. "Holy shit, this is ancient!" he said holding it in his hands.

I looked up and laughed realizing he had taken the tampons out of his nose. "Yeah, it's back when we were like 13 or something."

"Yep" He laughed placing it back where he found it. "My God, look at this one!" He grinned picking up a photo of all six of us. "We look so adult!" He noted, "Bobby and Jerry probably were about to move out of Ma's house when this was taken. I remember Angel was talking about joining the military about this time too!"

I nodded. "Yeah, that's about right because that was taken the right before the third and last time my dad would be going to prison." I remembered that photo so than the other one but not only for the reasons about my dad. We were all together then, we all looked so happy, like a real family.

He put it back and turned to look at me. "Ready?" He asked pulling his lips into a small smile.

I sighed, "I think so." I muttered slinging my purse over my shoulder.

He nodded and followed me as I walked downstairs. I shut off a few of my lights before we left. I walked side by side Jack to Ma's. We were silent, I caught him looking at me though, studying me almost. I kept quiet and looked straight forward. He walked ahead of me so he could open the front door, allowing me to walk in before him.

Bobby stood in the middle of the kitchen catching sight of us as we walked in. "What the hell do I look like, Jack? A fucking taxi driver?"

I let out a sarcastic laugh. "You look like a huge penis to me" I retorted with a small shrug. Jack busted out into laughter.

Bobby's eyes grew narrow, boy did he look pissed. "If you weren't a girl, I'd gut you like a fucking fish!" He snapped pointing his finger at me.

I nodded. "Are we leaving or what?" I asked looking at Bobby then at Jack. Bobby let out an agitated scoff before snatching up his coat and walking out of the house, shutting the door hard behind him. "My God, he is the pissiest fucker I have ever met!" I scowled walking toward the door.

Jack laughed and shut the door behind us. We walked out to the car and found that Bobby hadn't gotten in yet. "Riley, you're riding shotgun." He informed me slipping into the driver's seat. Jack climbed into the back seat without question, I wouldn't be that easy though and Bobby knew that.

"Why am I sitting up front?" I demanded setting my purse in my lap before shutting the door.

Bobby laughed, "So I can pop you every time you're a smartass."

I grinned. "Well, isn't that nice." I retorted feeling a hand against my arm just a few moments later. "Ouch, that kind of hurt!" I whined rubbing my arm where Bobby had slapped me.

"Do not fucking hit her again, Bobby." Jack advised with a cold stare.

Bobby cocked his head to the side. "And what are you going to do if I don't?" I glanced back at Jack, he was on edge. He looked angry, that was an emotion I hadn't seen on him in quite a few years. Jack never got angry, at least not since he'd been a teen or older.

"I'm going to kick your ass, that's what." Jack growled clinching his fists tighter.

"I'll pull over right now if you really feel that way, Jackie!" Bobby laughed.

"Both of you!" I shouted, "Shut the fuck up. Bobby you're a fucking idiot! Stop acting all big and bad, I know you won't actually do anything." I turned to look at Jack, "I can handle it, Jackie. I'm a big girl" I smiled, "Thank you though." I turned back around to find Bobby staring me down. "Could you stop staring at me and drive?" I ordered before looking straight ahead ignoring him.

A few moments later we arrived at the funeral home and all got out. I walked close behind them, dreading the next couple of hours. It was going to feel like eternity and I was sure everyone knew that.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5; True Feelings

After the funeral I was able to convince Jack and the boys to let me have some alone time for the night. Free of break-ins or interruptions, but only if I promised I'd call if I needed something. I promised that only to shut them up. Angel never showed up, which really upset me but I was sure he had a good reason. I stopped by Jerry's for a few minutes, to say hello to Camille and the girls.

"Hey!" I greeted Camille as I walked in. I found her and the girls in the kitchen, smiling at me.

"Aunt Riley!" Amelia screamed clinging on to my waist. I laughed, before picking her up in a bear hug. I placed her back on her feet, smiling at her before she ran back off to wherever.

Camille came over and gave me a hug, "I'm so sorry baby" she whispered before letting me go.

I just nodded and tried to pull my lips into something of a smile. "It's okay, Camille." She shook her head, leaving it alone. I noticed that she was looking at something outside; I turned around to see the huge window that was visible to the large driveway outside. "It's weird seeing them together, isn't it?" I questioned with a smile.

She nodded, "Yeah, it's just sad that their Momma's death was the thing that brought 'em together." She shook her head and returned to whatever it was she was doing. I just stood there and watched them, talking and carrying on. It was really awesome to see them like that, so content. I realized they were heading inside to I transferred my attention back to Camille.

"Anything I can help with?" I chimed leaning against the countertop.

She looked over at me and smiled. "Nope, I got it. Thank you though." Now the boys were in the kitchen, Jack was the first to give Camille an awkward one armed hug while Bobby kept his distance, still looking pissed at the world. "Hey Jack" Camille smiled before returning to the dishes. Jerry hugged Camille from behind kissing her cheek before talking more with the boys.

"Hey guys" I muttered with a small wave. Jack smiled and waved back.

"Hey girl" Bobby said with an attitude. I rolled my eyes and ignored him.

"Hey Rye" Jerry grinned giving me a hug. "You good?" he asked in a low murmur studying my face as I answered. I gave a nod and he left it alone.

"I should probably get going; I have some studying and homework to catch up on."

Jack raised an eyebrow, "Translation: My favorite TV show is playing reruns tonight, I have to get home and watch them." He gave me a grin, I just smiled. He was partially right, That 70's Show did come on tonight, but I did have things for school to do. "Give me a hug" He told me opening his arms wide. I walked into him and he wrapped me up in his arms, squeezing me tight. After releasing me we shared a smile and I hugged Camille and the girls one last time before treading out, giving everyone another small wave and goodbye.

I walked out to my car and headed back to my house. I had almost half the day left; it was only three in the afternoon. After I'd arrived home I changed into some more comfortable clothes and climbed into bed. I laid there for a long time, just staring at the ceiling fan. I didn't realize how tired I was until I was asleep.

I was sitting at the kitchen table with Ma, we were drinking coffee and just having a chat. "How are you and Jackie?" She asked taking a long sip of her coffee before setting it down and waiting for my answer.

I tilted my head to the side, somewhat confused by her question. "Jackie and I?" I repeated awkwardly, "we – we're fine…" I sipped my coffee and glazed out the window.

"When are you going to tell him, Riley?" She questioned. I looked at her to see her giving me a curious look. "You know everyone can see it but you two. You care about him. You might even love him and he feels the same for you."

I shook my head, "No, Mom. No, no, no, I don't love him that way and he doesn't love me that way! I care about him that's all. I think a lot of him!" I defended.

She laughed, "Riley, honey, you know you can't fool me. You have feelings for Jack, you have for years. You need to tell him before it's too late." She advised with her motherly smile. I watched as she disappeared, slowly faded away into thin air.

I jumped up from my seat, "Mom, wait, wait mom!" I shouted after her, "Mom, I wasn't done talking! Get back here! I still have questions! What the hell are you talking about? Before what's too late? What's going to happen?" I screamed looking around for her. Where the hell did she go, I knew I was dreaming but couldn't I control my dreams? Couldn't I control whether or not she answered my questions?

I opened my eyes; "Fuck" I muttered slinging the covers off my body. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, I wasn't sure how I should react to the dream. It was so real but I knew I was dreaming, I knew she was dead I went to her funeral a few hours ago. I still didn't understand why I dreamed that though, did my head know something I wasn't aware of? Was I in love with Jack? Was it really that obvious? I ran my hand through my hair and thought over what I'd just asked myself.

Maybe I did love Jack. I mean, I did have an overpowering feeling when I was around him. I felt this weird fluttering feeling in my stomach when he smiled. When he laughed my whole body ached, looking into his eyes felt like I was safe forever. What if all I was feeling wasn't the type of love everyone thought it was? I'd never felt this way about anyone before, I mean I had crushes, but what I felt for Jack was different. It was solid and unconditional. I'd do anything for him and I was almost sure he'd do anything for me. Just being around him made me feel okay, no matter what my mood was before he was around. I missed him when he was away, I missed him something fierce and I worried about him too. I did love him, I loved him and I have for a very long time. I didn't have the time or the strength to fight it anymore. I'm done making up excuses, if everyone already knows, what am I lying for?

I got up and grabbed my phone out my purse. I glanced at the time and noticed it was only seven-thirty, I was sure he would still be up.

I dialed his number and held the phone to my ear. I tried to stay calm but I was anxious. I didn't know how he would react. "Hello?" he answered in his usual deep voice. I heard his guitar faintly in the background.

"Oh, I'm sorry. You – you sound busy. Just call me later." I muttered about to hang up.

"No!" He boomed anxiously, the guitar went silent. "I'm not busy, what's up?" He continued.

"Can - can you come over?" I stumbled out slowly. I fiddled with my fingers as I spoke.

I could hear background noise, it sounded like he was moving things around. "Yeah, yeah I'm on my way." He told me before he hung up.

I fell back on my bed, "You better be right." I whispered toward heaven. I don't feel like my brain could come up with something as outrageous as what I'd dreamed about. It had to be her talking to me, it had to be. I heard a loud banging coming from down stairs and I hurried down to answer the door. "Hey" I smiled at Jack.

His face flooded with relief, "You're okay" he breathed with a smile.

I nodded, "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" I asked as he walked in. I closed the door behind him and locked the door back.

He stood facing me, I glanced up at him. "You sounded pretty frantic on the phone…" he muttered studying my face.

"I just wanted to talk, that's all!" I smiled. I grabbed his arm and pulled him to the sofa. I sat down and he sat down beside me. "I know, I'm going to sound completely crazy but I need to tell you something, Jack." I explained sucking in a deep breath.

He raised an eyebrow, "Okay. Go on." He pressured with a concerned look.

I stared at the floor as I told him; I couldn't look him in the eyes. "I had a dream, after the funeral I came home and I fell asleep. I dreamed about Ma. We were sitting at the kitchen table, having coffee… She asked how 'we' were, as in me and you. Then she started saying I needed to tell you how I really feel… That I need to do it now, because it might be too late when I'm ready to tell you. I think I love you Jack, I think I really love you. More than I've admitted to love you… and this is really hard and awkward to tell you, but I don't think I should try to deny it anymore, so I'm just throwing it out there." I looked up to find his face in shock and maybe a little horrified. "I'm sorry, Jack. I shouldn't have – I didn't want it to be awkward, I just thought you should know…"

He shook his head, "No, it's – it's fine, Rye. I get it; everything that's going on has got you a little wigged out. It's cool." He muttered staring at his hands. "I – I think I should head back, Bobby was about to go to the bar and he wanted me to tag along. It's guys night, since you had homework and all. Maybe we can talk tomorrow…" I stood up and headed for the door. As he walked, I followed him. "I'll uh, I'll call you later, Riley. If you need anything, call my cell." He said rubbing the back of his neck before leaving. I locked the door behind him.

I fell against the back of the door, sliding down it till I sat on the floor. My feet were straight out in front of me. What the fuck did I just do? That isn't how I'd thought it would go, not even close. I didn't expect him to admit he felt the same, but the last thing I expected was for him to react like that. What if he went and told Bobby? What the hell was I going to do then? I'd never live that down. What if I'd just ruined the only relationship I had left?

I picked myself up off the floor and headed back up to my room. I stopped in the kitchen for my tub of ice cream. It was going to be a long night, I could already tell.


	6. Chapter 6

*****I do not own anything from Four Brothers nor do I have anything to do with any actor, character or anything of that nature involved with the film. My story is pure fiction and for your enjoyment.*****

_Chapter 6; More Than Meets the Eye_

I woke up later than usual, only because I stayed up all night long. I couldn't sleep, not with everything that was going on in my head. Sleep just simply wasn't possible and the worst part was the one person that could make it better was the reason I couldn't sleep.

I sat up in bed feeling the sunshine against my face; it was warm in my house despite the freezing temperatures just outside my window. I pushed myself back to rest against my headboard. I glanced at the clock beside my bed; "Dammit" I muttered realized I'd slept till two in the afternoon. To make matters even worse, it was thanksgiving and I was home alone.

I grabbed my phone from the table beside my bed, curious to see if I had missed any calls. I held my breath as I clicked middle button causing the screen to light up and show that I had not only one missed call, but four. Three from Jack and one from Jerry, I debated on who to call back.

I weighted my phone in my hand before choosing Jerry as the smartest option. I hit the green button and held the phone to my ear. "Where the hell are you?" Jerry demanded somewhat agitated.

"I – I'm at home… Why?" I retorted confused.

"Why aren't you at mom's with the family?"

"I wasn't aware I was supposed to be…"

"It's Thanksgiving, isn't it?" He asked sarcastically

"Well, yes but did Jack not tell you about last night?" I wondered somewhat surprised.

He laughed, "No, he did. You know that boy can't keep his mouth shut for nothing, but that don't change you being our sister… Well, maybe not as much Jack's but the rest of us."

I laughed, "Yeah… about that, I don't think Jack sees me as much more than a sister. I'll be over in a few though, just let me get ready."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that first part, but okay, hurry, dinner's already cooking."

"What do you mean by -" After hearing the click I cut myself off, "Asshole." I scoffed slamming my phone down beside me and getting out of bed. I shuffled into the bathroom still somewhat dazed from sleep. I pulled out a towel from the closet, placing it on the countertop. I turned the hot water on full blast before switching it over to the shower.

I stepped in and let the water cover me, just like I usually did. My shower head was one of those huge ones, the style where it opened in a large circle and fell on you something like rain. I washed up quickly before getting out so I could get ready to leave for Ma's. From the my eye I noticed my phone was blinking telling me that I had a new voicemail.

I quickly called it back and listened closely.

"Hey, Rye. It's me, Jack, I uh, I just wanted to apologize for last night. I know I just kind of wigged out and left. I'm really sorry; you just caught me off guard. I was calling to talk to you about it but apparently you're coming over for Thanksgiving, so I'll just talk to you then, maybe face to face would be better… Either way, I'll uh, I'll see you soon. Okay, later."

I grinned to myself, he was incredibly awkward but I found that one of my favorite characteristics of his. I grabbed a nice but simple blouse from my closet and a pair of skinny jeans. I pulled them on, grabbed my purse, slipped into my shoes and hurried down stairs. I speed walked down to Ma's anxious and somewhat excited about what today would hold. I didn't bother to knock, I just walked in and found Jerry and Angel wrestling in the living room and Bobby commentating from the couch. I stood in the doorway and waited for them to finish. Jerry helped Angel up; as soon as he had seen me I flashed him a big grin.

He gave a big smile, "Riley!" He shouted wrapping his arms around me.

"Angel!" I laughed hugging him back.

He released me after a long moment, "How are you girl?" He asked "Damn, you're just all grown up!" He laughed surprised.

I nodded, "Yeah, I am. I'm good, going to college; working at Starbucks… Nothing too exciting" I shrugged.

He laughed, "Well, it's good to see you sis." He smiled.

"You too, Angel." I agreed noticing Jack in the kitchen. I left the boys back in the living room and went to talk to Jack. He was bent over the oven; he pulled out the turkey and set it on the stove top. "Hey" I uttered leaning against the doorframe.

He looked over at me startled, "Oh, hey Rye. I didn't see you there." He said slipping off his ovenmitts and setting them off to the side. "So uh, about last night… I – I can explain."

I shook my head, "We'll talk after dinner." I told him with a smile. He nodded.

"Come on, let's eat! Bring out that bird." Bobby demanded walking into the dining room and sitting at the table.

I giggled to myself before walking into the dining room and taking the seat across from Jack. He placed the turkey on the table before sitting down. I smiled across at him, he smiled back. Bobby stood up and the rest of us did seconds after. We grabbed hands and he said the prayer. All I could think about was how perfect Jack's hand felt in mine.

Hearing 'Amen' broke my trance, "Amen" I uttered a few seconds late before sitting back down. We passed the food around and ate in silence. I noticed the boys kept looking over where Ma's empty chair sat. I couldn't bring myself to look so instead I stared at my plate, glancing only once at Jack. Jack looked tense, scared almost. He looked over to the corner of the table, toward where mom used to sit. He stared for a long moment, with the look of pain strung across his face.

I gently rubbed my right foot against his leg, trying to comfort whatever it was that was bothering him. The pained look gradually vanished and he gave me a small smile. I pulled my right leg back over my left and continued to eat. Bobby informed us sometime after dinner we'd all be going to play hockey like we used to do after Thanksgiving growing up. Once we had finished eating Jack and I cleaned up the kitchen and remains of the dinner.

Bobby came bustling into the kitchen soon after we'd started, "I'm gunna go take a nap before we go play hockey." He informed us before walking upstairs.

Jack and I were alone in our own silence; the only noise was running water and the clanking of dishes. Jack cleared his throat, I knew immediately that he was about to explain last night. My heart started pounding, my stomach churned and the lump in my throat grew tighter.

"So" He started awkwardly placing another soapy dish on my side to be rinsed, "About last night… I just want you to know I wasn't trying to be an ass. I just kind of freaked, because when you told me I got overwhelmed with my own feelings and I didn't know how to respond." He paused and turned to look at me. I turned the water off and looked up at him, giving him my undivided attention. My heart raced and my legs felt like jello, I braced myself on the counter edge. "I love you too, Riley. I guess I just didn't know how to explain it to you; I've never really had to tell a girl how I really felt before. The closest thing I've had to 'love' is a good one night stand. I've never really had anything meaningful and I guess knowing I could have something real with you kinda makes me freak out… I care about you; I always have, even growing up I don't think I'll ever stop caring. I guess I've always had this weird feeling for you, I could never really explain it so I just pushed it away." He swallowed hard before he continued, "But I'm willing to give it a shot if you are."

I swallowed hard, our eyes stayed locked. I felt infinite in this moment. I could stay here forever, right here looking into his eyes. God, I needed to blink or pinch myself or something. I was convinced I had to be dreaming. I grinned and he smiled too, letting out a quick breath. It was something similar to a sigh of relief.

"Pinch me" I breathed slowly still looking at him.

"What?" He asked confused. "Pinch you?" He repeated raising an eyebrow.

"Yes" I confirmed shaking my head slowly. He stared at me for a long moment; he was thinking I just wasn't sure about what though.

He placed one of his hands on either side of my face, I instantly froze. He continued to look at me, searching my face. He hesitated before inching his face closer to mine. Close your eyes stupid! I reminded myself feeling foolish. I closed my eyes and barely stuck my lips out; just milliseconds later I felt Jack's cool smooth lips meet mine. He pressed briefly before moving his head back and letting his arms fall to his sides. I opened my eyes to find him staring at me, watching me closely for my reaction.

I giggled to myself before standing on my tip-toes to place another approving kiss on his lips. He smiled. "Fireworks? Butterflies? Uh, exploding hearts? That fat baby with the arrow?" He asked rubbing the back of his neck. "Anything?" He begged with pleading eyes.

I giggled again to myself, "All of it" I answered with the butterflies exploding in my stomach. "What about you?" I asked cautiously looking up at him.

He swallowed hard and looked at me for a moment before he answered. "Fuckin' bliss" He grinned giving me a hug. "I see this lasting, Riley. Now, to tell the guys…" He was thinking out loud.

I pulled away from him so I could see his face, "We don't have to tell them… We can just let them find out on their own, not hide it but when they see us holding hands or something, they can just know." I suggested thinking of how awkward it would be to sit them down and explain, why make it more difficult than it needed to be?

He nodded realizing my logic, "Good idea" He smiled.

I yawned. "I'm sleepy…" I muttered running a hand through my hair.

"Go lay up in my bed, I'm going to go double check that we have all our old hockey sticks still. I'll come up and lay with you till we have to get ready for hockey." He explained

I nodded, "Hey where are the other boys anyway?" I asked realizing I hadn't seen Angel or Jerry since dinner.

"Jerry went back home and Angel is probably upstairs with Sophie."

I raised an eyebrow before I rolled my eyes, "He's with loco puta again?" I asked somewhat annoyed by the fact.

He nodded, "Si"

I shook my head and left it alone, "None of my business anyways. I'll be upstairs." I informed him walking from the kitchen and up to Jack's room. Passing by Angel's room I heard rapid movement and moaning. "Dear God" I muttered petrified now speed walking for Jack's room. Once I was in I closed the door and climbed into his bed that reeked of smoke. "Ew" I whined wrinkling my nose. He knew how much I hated smoke, it practically repulsed me.

I tried to ignore it and get comfortable. I pushed my face into a pillow and closed my eyes, breathing in the mixed smell of Jack and his nicotine. I waited for him to return before I would actually sleep. It wasn't long before I heard his bedroom door open to close shortly after. I opened my eyes to see a confused look of disgust on his face.

"Are you okay?" I asked analyzing his expression.

He shook his head, "No. I just heard Sophie and Angel doing the nasty…" He winced climbing into the bed with me.

I laughed, "Yeah… Me too" I shuttered.

He laughed wrapping his arms around me and drawing me to him. I laid my head on his chest, "Do you think we're moving too fast?" I asked somewhat worried.

"Not for me." Jack assured playing with my hair, "I think we're going slow enough. If a girl is in my bed we're usually having sex by now."

I laughed, "Right… Well you don't expect that of me, do you?" I questioned.

"No, of course not! You're different, Riles. I want to make sure we're ready. You matter; there is a hell of a difference between you and other girls."

I sighed, "Thanks Jack… I guess it's just going to take some time getting used to it. I mean it won't take too long but I think I'm still in shock."

He nodded, "It's okay, baby. Sleep, I know you're tired."

I silently agreed before I listened to his slow and even heartbeat. His hands continued to play with my blonde waves until I was fast asleep and unaware of reality.

I slept for a good hour and a half before I felt Jack suddenly move. My eyes flashed open. I looked up at him before glancing around the room for an answer.

"Sorry, Riley." He whispered somewhat startled himself. "I heard someone come in and I didn't know it was Bobby."

I now saw Bobby standing in the doorway. I gave him a cold stare. "Morning Princess" He greeted with his usual plastered blank face.

"Is it time to go yet?" I wondered sitting up.

Bobby nodded, "Yeah, you playin'?"

I shrugged, "I don't know, you think I can keep up?" I retorted with a smartass smirk.

He gave me an unamused glare, "I don't know. Go get your stick though, we leave in five." He announced before disappearing.

Jack got up and changed into warmer clothes. I moved my body to face away from the wall, leaning against it as I watched him change. "Do you have an extra hoodie by chance?" I wondered watching him slip off his pants.

"Yeah" He replied standing in front of me in nothing on but his briefs. I couldn't help but notice his massive bulge, God I never remembered it being that profound. I stared at it for a moment, not realizing how obvious I was being. I glanced up at his face; he was looking right at me. I tried to hide the look of horror from my face. He chuckled before flashing me a smile. "Good thing we had our talk or I just might be creeped out." He teased.

My face turned bright red, I stiffed out a laugh. "Yeah… Sorry, I couldn't help but notice… You've really matured." He shrugged throwing one of his leather jackets and a hoodie at me. "Thanks" I muttered pulling it on over my blouse then the leather jacket over it.

"No problem." He muttered.

I got up from the bed, "I think I'm going to wait downstairs. Is there an extra stick for me?" I paused at the door waiting for his answer.

"Mhm, there should be." He said slipping on his jeans.

"Cool, I'll only join in if you need me." I told him walking downstairs.

I waited at the kitchen table for Jack to come down. "Wanna ride together and we'll meet them at the rink?" He asked flashing me a smile, "I'll drive. That's what the guy in the couple does right?" He questioned in a serious tone.

I laughed, "Yeah Jackie, that's one of the things a guy does."

"Good" He smiled, "I'll go tell Bobby." He left me in the kitchen. I stood there and waited for him to return before I handed over my keys. "Ready?" He asked placing his arm around my neck and walking towards the door.

"Yep" I grinned shutting the door behind us. After we left the driveway he removed his arm from around my neck. I kept my arms by my sides as I walked; somewhat surprised when I felt his fingers start to intertwine with mine. I looked up to meet his gaze with a giddy smile, he returned it. When we'd reached my car he stuffed the hockey sticks and his ice-skates in my back seat while I ran up and grabbed my skates off the front porch. I watch him slide into the driver's seat before unlocking my door for me to get in. After I got in I cranked on the heat and turned the radio on to the local rock station, something I thought he and I would both enjoy.

We rode in silence, sharing smiles at every stop light. He would drum on the steering wheel or sing a lyric or two if he felt the need. I just watched and giggled. We arrived right after Bobby and Angel, but just before Jerry. He grabbed the sticks and his skates from the backseat and walked with me toward Bobby and Jerry. Bobby wore his Red Wings jersey; I smiled as soon as I'd saw it.

"Looks real good on you, bro." I commented with a sincere smile. He nodded. "So, where's Jerry?" I asked impatiently.

"On his way, he'll anytime now." Angel answered crossing his arms from the cold.

After Jerry arrived the boys grabbed their sticks and pulled on their skates. I went and sat off on one of the bleachers to watch.

I watched in silence for the first few minutes. "What the hell, Bobby?" I demanded throwing my hands up in the air. "What are you doing Angel?" I sneered now growing agitated by how bad they were playing. "Hey, watch it!" I shouted to one of the opposing players when he knocked Jack on the ground. "Time out!" I finally called fifteen minutes into the game.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" One of the guys shouted in disgust.

"What baby?" Jack asked skating over to me.

I sat down and slipped on my skated and grabbed my stick. "I'm playing." I told him stepping out onto the ice.

"But you're a girl!" One of the other guys shouted.

"And?" I retorted lifting a middle finger to him.

"And the teams will be uneven." Another guy chimed in.

"I think someone is scared of getting their ass handed to them in hockey by a girl!" Bobby chanted. "But then again, after all she is a Mercer." He grinned.

"Yeah, B. I think they are." I agreed.

"Fine, she can play." The same guy from earlier piped up.

I gave

my brothers and Jackie a grin. "Let's do this." I shouted slamming my stick down on the ice a few times. We whorled around the rink, passing the puck to one another. A guy came up on Jerry and I slammed into him stopping him dead in his tracks and knocking him on the ice. Once I got the puck I took it down to the goal and shot it straight in. "Goal!" I screamed throwing my arms into the air.

"Good job, babe." Jack congratulated giving me a victory kiss. I could feel everyone staring at us. "What?" He demanded looking at each of his brothers.

I was turning red again I could feel my cheeks get hot. I knew shit was about to hit the fan. I gazed at Jack before I dared look to see the other boy's faces. What the hell was I going to do now?


End file.
